Okay so on April 22, 2012 Kadence lost her first tooth. To her pleasure the tooth fairy gave her $2, which she then gave to me because " You don't have any money momma." What a heart! But I made her keep it, not to worry!
In April we also had Isabella's "Aloha Kindergarten" Night. Basically Kindergarten registration with games and food and fun! It's hard to believe she will be in kindergarten next year and Olivia in preschool.
Blaine came home for 5 and half days. The first time since February. We were all happy for him to be home and very sad to see him go. But we are going to try for him to come home for 3 days every 3 weeks.
I am reading a new book, "My So Called Life as a Proverbs 31 Wife." It's about being a better wife and mother and how it's okay not to be perfect. So far so good and I really think I will learn something from it. The first 2 chapters have already made me want to "Clean House" my house. Though it will be hard to be a better wife to a husband whom is not here, I will still try my best with every day.
Wednesday May 9th, was Olivia's last day at Bost. She tested out of their program. I am very sad because I was at least hoping to have 2 more weeks at home to myself to get things done but I am glad that she is smart enough to go to preschool and has corrected some her of dyslexic speaking.
Thursday night (May 10th) Kadence had a music program at the school of all the songs they had learned through out the year. Her class had "Hey Jack" and had to wear Halloween costumes. It was very cute!!
I am leaving the 25th to go get Madison, willing that we have enough funds to pay for the gas and meals. I can only imagine it's going to take at least $400 in gas. But I haven't seen her since November, and I miss her so much.
Speaking of being a mom, tomorrow, is one of the days I dread most (the first being the day my mom died, the third being her birthday and the 4tnh being my birthday as I am no longer going to be in my 20's...BOO) Mother's Day. I hate thee. I am sorry to rain on anyone's parade and I know I should just be "positive" and thankful for the time I had with her and the time that I have with my kids, but until you have lost one of the most important people in your life, you will not know how it feels. You do not know the pain seeing everyone's happy facebook posts and photos. You do not feel the envy that comes from seeing you and your mom and her grandchildren in their Sunday best after church going to a nice lunch. I would give almost anything to have my mom here for one more Mother's Day. One more hug, one more kiss, one more "I love you." The other day I heard the kids talking while I was driving. Kadence asked Bryceton if she had a nana. He replied yeah but she's dead. I was thankful my sunglasses hid my tears as I politely asked them to talk about something else.
I normally stay home and lock myself in the room and cry all day. But since Blaine isn't here to help with the kids I will be putting on my happy (fake happy) face and go to church (New Life Church is AWESOME!!) and spend the day cleaning up after and caring for my kiddos. That is why I am a mother isn't it?
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